Some Flava from Ava

5/14/15 – This special post was written over Mother’s Day weekend. I haven’t had time to update this until now. Just so everyone has the proper context!

Today is Friday. Sunday is Mother’s Day. Do I feel bad going to Virginia Beach for a cheerleading competition and “taking my mom” or do I understand the point where it’s best for me. I’m really not sure. I know it’s best for ME if my mom goes. But it isn’t best for HER, my BROTHER, and my DAD. That’s two more people. I want her to have her normal Mother’s Day. I feel bad that it’s gonna be a beautiful day, and she’s  going to be inside a hot auditorium. We celebrated Mother’s Day today, and Victor and I made my mom breakfast in bed, but it just didn’t feel the same. Maybe it was the fact that Victor had to go to school right after. I just don’t know.yes I felt bad about “taking my mom for the weekend, ” but maybe it is best for me. Maybe I need this and I need her to be there. My dad, mom, and brother, would not put me through this if it was best for me. But they might think it’s best for me, but is it best for them?  No, and they think and I think it’s okay. I want them to be happy even if I’m alone at the competition. 

4/26/15 –

I had a dream last night. I wouldn’t consider it a nightmare, but I didn’t enjoy it, until the end at least. It started by me waking up, so I actually belived it was happening. I woke up, and my dad, in a suit, was off to work. I said “Wow dad, are you off to work?” He looked at me like I had ten eyes. I was really confused. My mom, came downstairs, in her gym clothes. She said she was going to the gym. I said, “I’m really proud of you mom, finding some time to do something for yourself.” Once again, the crazy-ten eyed look. I just didn’t get it. “Bye!” Victor said running out the door. Everyone was running all over the place, and we didn’t even have our daily “What’s happening today” talk. I turned my head to look over at our (Well mine) favorite family picture, the one of us all wearing our #bradstrong beanies. The hats, weren’t there. I turned to look at the jar where the bradstrong bracelets are. It was empty. It all started to come together, my dad, did not have cancer. Then I realized, maybe this cancer thing isn’t all that bad. Maybe, it happened for a reason, to bring my family closer together. Because this new family, I didn’t like. That’s when I thought about it, maybe everything happens for a reason. And I think EVERYBODY, big or small, young, or old, strong or weak, good, or bad, cancer, or not cancer, deserves to know that.





2/21/15 –

If I had one wish, it would be to cure cancer. My wish, is a dream. And sometimes, a dream is a mission. And NO MISSION, is EVER impossible. My dad is one, of many fighters. Yet also, one, of many survivors. Everyday, his eyes get a little smaller. His legs get a little more rashes. His head becomes more and more bald. But that doesn’t stop him. No, but who would stop your thinking right? Well, it’s not like that. It’s hard to keep fighting you know. Especially when you have as little strength as him. I can’t even imagine being in his position right now. Everyone counting on him to feel better. It’s really not that easy.

26 responses to “Some Flava from Ava

  1. Ava, you are a beautiful girl inside and out! It is wonderful how you can put your feelings down on paper to share with us all. Xo

  2. Ava-

    You rock!

    Your dad is correct…it does help to write things down when upset. Keep up the great writing.

    xo Jennifer R.

  3. Ava, you are a brave girl! You probably don’t remember me but I am your old (but not old 🙂 ) neighbor from Minnesota. I remember you when you were a little girl. You are growing up beautifully. And now we are both writers. Writing has gotten me though a lot of tough times. It doesn’t make the tough stuff go away but sometimes you just feel better after you write things down and get them off your chest. Keep doing what you are doing! And I will keep reading!

  4. Hi Ava, I was reading your blog as my kids swim in a pool at 10pm. You write very well and I hope it does help to get it out. It must suck having everyone bring up your dads cancer all the time but I guess they just want him to know they are thinking about him and are rooting for him. He is a strong guy and you guys are strong too. I hope Mexico was fun, from your dads pictures you all seem to be having fun. I hope to see you soon.- beth

  5. Ava- Hope you all had a great time in Mexico…You always do :)!!! Love your writing! When people ask Daddy “How’s it going?” Know that they love and care for him. But…also know that we all ask that to everyone…kinda a habit- not because something is wrong. I’m sure you ask that to your friends without even realizing it :)- It shows that you care about them. Ava- How are YOU doing? Hope you’re having the BEST winter break ever! Your mom and I went to get our nails done before break- She talked me into getting sparkles…appropriate for your trip to Mexico- a little crazy for my trip to Israel :). See you soon kiddo. Xoxo Amy

  6. Ava, I was reading your blog and I wish only the best for your dad and your family. I hope you had a great time in Mexico! I can’t wait to see you at soccer:)
    Xoxoxo your friend Katey Peretz

  7. Hi Ava – it was a pleasure for Sara and me to spend Sefer Li time together with you, and what a treat to read your blog. You are such a special girl and we’re very lucky to have you in our lives. Brian

  8. Ava,
    I have never met you but I love the way your brain works! I love the way you thought about the rude lady on the escalator…people who are rude or mean to others are people who are hurting…these people need our understanding and compassion…and that is what you did by not taking what she said personally- brilliant! That takes some adults I know a life time to figure out!
    You have a special gift, Ava!

  9. Ava,
    You are wise beyond you years and you are loved by many for all your wonderful attributes. Be strong, be you and lots of love and prayers are sent your way. You also write beautifully!

  10. Ava-
    You rock!!! You are a beautiful, courageous, mature, unbelievable gal. Your love and support for your Dad…and your family- is admirable.
    Ava, Your smiles lights up the world!!!
    As you are lifted up in cheerleading…know that you are surrounded by tons of family and friends- here to lift you up always!!!
    Cheering on your strong, courageous Dad!!!
    Send him lots of love from all of us today!!!
    Love you.
    The Rollins Family

  11. Ava,
    There is no wonder why you’re so sweet, insightful and loving, you come from two very special people. I admire your strength, it can’t be easy watching your dad. He’s a fighter and will continue to fight. Sending you much love from the Musen’s.

  12. Ava, thank you again for sharing. You know your Dad is strong and a fighter with more strength than anyone I know. Keep up your sharing, it keeps the rest of us strong. Love you girl.💖

  13. ava- I don’t really know you that weII but what you said was very impressive, I wish the best for you and your famiIy, remember, what doesn’t kiII you makes you stronger!

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